Pedophilia goes so much better with a shot of caffeine

THE SHINBONE STAR

Over a cup of joe fresh from my Keurig this morning, I joined the neighbors musing over Sean Hannity’s recent yap session about alleged pedophile and Christian icon Judge Roy Moore. Hiz Honor denies hanging out at high school football games and malls trolling for lovely children. Sean believes him, and so do a lot of unabashed Christians, some of them living in my white bread, golf cart heaven of a neighborhood.

The discussion focused on USA Today’s report that conservatives are destroying their Keurigs after the coffee giant decided to pull its advertising from Sean Hannity’s show over his lenient view of the allegations that are currently singeing Moore’s pious soul, exposing the blackness of his heart.

Without morning coffee the stakes rose higher. Morning chitchat with the Guns & Jesus set can get testy when folks haven’t had their morning shot of caffeine, and I don’t even live in Alabama. Might be best to not…

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